I’ve been taught to be busy and I’ve always been busy. I’m busy studying for a college degree, doing home chores or in a relationship (because I need to marry before I become AUNTIE), or at work or traveling for family occasions, just with anything to soak me in stress and overwhelm me.
I have been at that phase there is always that feeling to do something even when I am mentally or physically exhausted. ‘You are too young to rest’, they always tell me!
So much responsibility, fear, pressure, racing, and competition especially when you are from a polygamous kind of family. And when you are not running, you are a vagabond!
Yes, work is important. Yes, family obligations are significant. And yes, every other aspect of life I was currently dealing with was important.
But sometimes, all I needed was just a break, from all of it. And that is okay. Honestly? It’s necessary. And I shouldn’t have to feel guilty about it either. But I didn’t know that earlier.
It’s okay to leave my desk and go for a walk
Whether I am at home staring at the wall or sitting in the cubicle, Dear Self, it’s okay to get up and go for a walk.
I have those times while working when I feel overwhelmed. Pushing myself beyond the limit to keep working so I can work overtime and save up for futuristic or pending bills.
I will stand up, and go for a walk. If it’s nice out, go outside and get some fresh air. Try not thinking about my work for a few minutes, reset my mind, and come back with a new perspective. Yes, it may sound like a small thing to do, but it will make a big difference to me.
It’s okay to put my phone down
I spend so much time on phone calls and replying to chats and emails, I mean it in the sense that I feel like I should always answer right away.
Dear self, I will not allow my phone to deny me any bit of happiness or peace of mind I need on any day. So it is ok to put the phone down, leave it in another room when I am at home, try not using it for an hour before you go to bed, and try silencing it more. And replying when I feel more comfortable.
It’s okay to take social media to cleanse
I wake up in the morning to pick up my phone and start checking news updates, celebrity gist, or even looking for who to follow on Instagram. So much pressure!
Hey, there’s no rule that I need to check your accounts every day. There’s no rule that I need to post on Instagram every time I am outside. And no, there’s no rule that I need to accept every person that sends a friend request to me. It seems kind of silly that I even have to say all of this, right? But I’m sure there are some of you nodding along as you have obliged to at least one of the scenarios I mentioned.
I will take a break from checking my profile, and be fully present in the real world.
It’s okay to spend myself
I save every penny from my salary and side hustle, just so I can send money home, whenever there’s a need for it. I can’t remember when last I bought a new dress or eat at a fancy restaurant. I’m always eager to ask ‘how much’, and when the price is high, I remember my bills and quench the thirst with something else. There’s always something in my head reminding me of all pending accumulated bills, loans, and future bills.
Yes, it is okay to pamper me within my budget, especially when I know I worked my ass out for it. It will be okay to take off and go somewhere else.
The best cure for stress is self-care and relaxation. I don’t have to worry about those future bills and credit and loans, I need to take care of myself and focus on you. Everyone needs “me” time. So I will go for it.
It’s okay to do nothing
It’s ok to wake up and feel like chilling with Netflix or binging on some k-dramas on WeTv. I don’t necessarily need to get away to get out of the stressful routine of everyday life.
Don’t feel like going out this weekend? Don’t. Feel like you need a mental health day from work to just lounge around at home and binge-watch Netflix? I will do it. Or to read a good book? Immerse me into that world and take a break from the current world. I will Do it. A day or weekend of just doing nothing really can work wonders and help put me in a new mindset, for the next day or upcoming week. A staycation can be healing therapy for my stressed life.
It’s ok to laugh
Dear self, I will make myself happy, laugh more often, be less angry and eat plenty of chocolate.
Finally, It’s okay to be my real self, with no pressure, no obligations, and no stress.
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